Thursday, January 12, 2012

Postpartum My Eggo Update: Week 3

Things that have happened in the last week:
  1. After breakfast one morning, I remarked to ADD Daddy that it was only 9 a.m. and The Quiet Contemplator had been in her nighttime diaper for 14 hours and The Cool Cucumber had already peed in his own mouth. We are awesome parents.
  2. While cleaning the living room, we found a dried up wipe with poo on it. We are also classy.
  3. The first day ADD Daddy was back to work, The Cucumber had a doo doo explosion that resulted in the usage of an entire package of wipes, a bath and the washing of jammies, a swaddle wrap, the changing table cover and my pajamas. It was ugly. All 15 minutes after Daddy and The Contemplator walked out of the door.
  4. I barely haulted The Contemplator from jamming a set of keys into a power outlet. She likes to remove the childproof covers and give them to me as presents. Damn stupid smart kid.
Postpartum tip of the week: One of the suckiest things about having a baby is having to wear a pad for weeks on end. I have discovered the best pads ever, and thought I would share. I am pretty sure they are the ones they advertise on TV as being like a sports bra for your crotch. Though I don't exactly disagree, my vagina isn't exactly training for a marathon right now so I think there is a bit of a disconnect. Anyway. Always Infinity pads rock. They are SUPER thin, made of some weird space material that molds to your vag and they have big wings. I am a huge fan (well, as big of a fan as I can be of something that I refer to as "my diaper"). The Quiet Contemplator told me the other day, "Mommy, you need a new diaper." Um. Thanks.

4 comments:

  1. Aren't pads the grossest? Blech. At least Contemplator wasn't there during the doo doo explosion - that could have made things more complicated!

    ReplyDelete
  2. I'm not really digging on this whole bleeding for weeks on end thing either.. i guess its the price we pay for getting knocked up in the first place??? hmm

    ReplyDelete
  3. I'm glad you have a sense of humor about parenthood. No one is perfect, so we might as well laugh a bit along the way.

    ReplyDelete
  4. i LOVE these pads.... your absolutely right about them!

    ReplyDelete

I love hearing from you. It reinforces that writing this blog is not just a silly waste of my brain matter. If you leave a douche canoe comment, I will delete it. I am powerful like that.