I think my family needs a witchdoctor. STAT.

I think my family may have a curse on it. In the last three weeks, the following events have occurred:

1.     The Quite Contemplator started getting her second molars.
2.     The Quite Contemplator got the stomach flu.
3.     I got the stomach flu.
4.     Me and My Sponsor ended up in the hospital for dehydration.
5.     Said stomach flu and hospital visit caused me to miss the solo Eddie Vedder show that I have been dreaming about for the last six months.
6.     ADD Daddy got walking pneumonia.
7.     The Quite Contemplator got hand, foot and mouth (and butt) disease.
8.     Our decently new dishwasher crapped out on us—for good.
9.     My lost license was found by a convicted rapist who is on parole and wants to be my pen pal (no, seriously).

I am starting to feel like the Old Yeller of families. Maybe someone should take us all out behind the shed and put us out of our misery. Is it possible that another affliction could actually hit my family in the next week?

What’s your guess as to the next plague that will lay itself upon my household? Mad cow disease? Anal warts? Something involving the DMV?