Friday, June 3, 2011

REALLY? (Sh*t People Actually Said to Me)


On yesterday's subject of dumb things people say, I figured I would dust off some old stories of mine and share them with you. Today, our installment is called:

Stupid Sh*t People Actually Said to Me After I had a Baby
A week after I had the baby, I had to go to a friend’s art opening. I thought I looked pretty damn good for having had a baby a week earlier until three separate people came up to me and said, “Damn, when are you going to have that baby already?” To which I responded, “I had her last week.” To which they responded, “No seriously, when are you due.” Me, “No, seriously, I had her last week.” Commence hysterical tears.

When joking with a coworker that I was covered in baby snot because my daughter had a cold, she informed me that, had I breastfed (I didn't), my baby wouldn’t get sick. Oh, OK. Thanks for the info.

While holding a friend’s six-week-old baby, a coworker came up to me and said, “Wow, I didn’t think you were that far along again.” I said, “I am not. I had my baby eight months ago and I am not pregnant again.” But thank you for making me feel like a huge fat a$$ that looks seven months pregnant again.

1 comment:

  1. People say the dumbest things! So rude. I just want to say to them, "Your momma LIED when she told you that you were cute and funny." But that would be rude too, so I try to refrain. The pregnancy comments are what get me the most fired-up!

    ReplyDelete

I love hearing from you. It reinforces that writing this blog is not just a silly waste of my brain matter. If you leave a douche canoe comment, I will delete it. I am powerful like that.